Sometime between Mo yelling at the sausage fest of 20+ bandana-wearing Azn party crashers to leave, and one of those of those "hardcore" thugs stepping in my way and refusing to let me pass by -- I wondered, what the hell was I doing there.

Yes, a friend's bday party with birthday cake, half a house full of good friends, and the whole nine yards. Despite how much I like seeing my friends, I just want to lay down. This cold is making me feel like shit. And random bad asses getting in my face doesn't help either.

At least when I come home, none of that matters. We smoked a bowl, Nelson made me food, he gave me some medicine, and it was all better...

Friday Night Fun!

Life science statistics, organic chemistry, plant biology... what a way to celebrate 2 finished midterms. Plants are so lame. I don't know why anyone would want to study them their entire life. Its like studying rocks. Which is probably why there's only 2 geology majors out of the 20,000+ students here. Of course, I kicked ass in rock geology -- the most hated subject in 8th grade science. Nonetheless, rocks are still lame, except for ones worth big money.

I think I'd slowly die inside if I were to marry a botanist.

Dear Annoying Girl in the library,

If you're wondering why everyone in the study room gets up when you walk in with your boyfriend, its cuz you're damn annoying. Yes, everytime you walk in, loudly asking him dumb, random ass questions, I want to slap you and say "Bitch, shut da fuck up", and slap him and say "Boy, have some balls and tell her to shut da fuck up".

Making conversation about your favorite type of lined paper or the color of your sweater, does not, I repeat, DOES NOT make you sound or look cute. That nonsense coming out of your mouth ain't helping anyone, including that BF of yours who, by the way, is desperately trying to study. Plus, your voice is really annoying. Just go home, girl.

For the good of humanity,
Christine

What a great weekend, 3 barfdays rolled into one! Go Phil, Jason, and B. Leong!

Eureka! I deciphered the code to LIFE! Its... its... oh snaps I forgot it.

Anyways, my new Threadless shirt came in the mail today. That ol' high school black and red phase creeped back into me, but oh well, its a damn good tee.

Snowboarding 2 full days straight at Squaw Valley --> awesome. Now that I have control of what I'm doing (stopping, turning, switching sides, leafing, slowing down, jumping off the lift), its getting a lot more addicting. Yay for no more crashes and big bruises!

So while I thought I was gonna board with just Nancy and her friend Dan in a big cabin, it turns out we were lodging with 35+ other ppl. Spent the whole weekend sleeping, eating, and partying with the UCD/Alpine Ski Team in celebration of initiation weekend -- similar to random frat/sorority rituals -- welcoming new members, and fake ones (like myself).

Quite honestly, I didn't even know our school had a ski team, but they're totally friendly and foreign (literally -- London, Siberia?). Oh yea, and happy big B, Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. Although I was 1 of 5 "colored" ppl in the cabin (and possibly the entire resort), if it weren't for him, we wouldn't even be allowed to enjoy the gorgeous slopes.

Oh yea, and somebody should slap those white bitches who gave Nancy a tough time to receive snow patrol service, and the one who yelled at me for 5 minutes for bumping into her on a slope, and for the one who ignored our numerous requests for a cashier in the board shop, and to the one on the cable car giving attitude to the Mexican family that just wanted to LOOK at the mountains thru the windows because they couldn't afford actual lift tickets. Btw, I met more nice white ppl this weekend than my entire life combined. Its just that I also recognize that racism exists more often than neccessary, and sometimes its done in such an obvious manner, that I'm too shocked to call on it. Plus I don't wanna get my ass beaten by a bunch of ppl with personal lawyers waiting on them.

Been studying and doing lots of hw lately. When I'm being a study whore, he's being a bigger study whore. And when he's out having his fun, I'm staying out longer and coming back even more hammered. Its almost like we're in constant competition with each other... to prove what?

I have my own life, he has his. Two stubborn, self-reliant souls desperately trying to maintain our pride: independence.

3 parties in 2 nites. I'm partied out. I don't know why I keep showing up to these functions, tho I must admit that I do have a good time.

Back to school. Its the first time all year that I'm ahead in 2 of my classes. Yay!

It's not too hard to say "I don't know."

My heart is killing me, literally. I woke up today to chest pains and a heart that feels like its squeezing and anxiously trying to jump out. Its 1:21, and it still feels this way. Damn, I haven't had this problem since senior year of high school. Maby its a sign that I have to work out more.

First post of the year 2005.

2004 was quite an eventful year filled with firsts, lasts and a whole lot of randomness. Lots of lessons learned from those experiences, usually the shitty experiences. Lots of pushing myself to the edge physically (especially the first half of 2004, 4-5 nites at the gym a week?!), mentally (yes, I still believe in getting A's in college), socially (many parties, many faces, mucho drama), and emotionally (I don't even want to get started with this issue). I questioned myself and those who surrounded me, more than ever this year. That's actually a good thing, though.

My only realistic goal this year is to bring my GPA up from its gradual downfall. Other than that, I don't have many expectations for this new year, simply curious of the forthcoming events. How will I fare with a guy in my life? How will extended family members and I handle this year's first wedding together in over a decade? Are we really as dysfuctional as I think we are?

"Only time will tell..."