Deadbolts on bedrooms? Ridiculous! Who the hell wants to steal my shit?... Moreover, who the hell wants to steal your shit?!

Damn, I can just sense another Brian-Serena-esque episode occuring in my future apartment. I consider myself a pretty damn responsible person. Probably the MOST responsible in my household (yes, it sounds like bragging, but its true). Rarely am I offended. But when I'm told in sugar coated words that I CAN'T be trusted and that I have underlying forces of evil by some woman who doesn't even know me, then of course I'm going to take offense AND disgust. Do you even know what your own goddam kid is up to?

I highly doubt so. Just wait till she finds out what her kid's been up to. I'd look like a fucking angel compared to all those dirty lies they've been using on her.