Too much thinking... and too much is mucho bad. Avoided all this thinking by talking to Alvin in his room 'til 5:30 am this morning. Luckily he's hyperactive and jet lag from his Taiwan trip. Talking and seeing a face helps everything even if its about nothing. Chatting lets thoughts out, but human contact gives a certain reassurance that this damn AIM invention can't replace.

Its been nonstop talking and listening for the past 4 days, since I last high-drunk called Nelson on Thursday night, while he was on his way to a careless weekend in SD. Letting out some subtle (and not so subtle) angry, annoyed, frustrated, disappointed sarcastic remarks on the cell, half of which I don't remember and half of which I really meant. Since that night, no contact.

No fighting, no confrontations. Always a bunch of sarcastic jabs -- half cruel, half humor, all truth. Two pansies hiding in their own laughter.