Saturday mornings are, by far, the best hair days EVER. Not because my hair looks good on Saturdays (cuz it doesn't), but because I get wake up and not do a damn thing to my hair. Not a single touch! That means floppy, messy hair all day!

There she stood, walking her small bicycle, adorned with basket and flowers, through a long walkway lined with towering trees. Flower petals swept through the air and through her hair. Then she suddenly stops and turns around, almost instinctively. A young man from a far distance comes walking her way -- with a giant smile on his face. He walks past me and I see this huge bouquet of flowers hiding behind his back. She puts her hand to her mouth and starts giggling profusely and saying things in disbelief. He says some charming things to her, hands her the flowers, and they laugh and hug and walk the rest of the walkway together, smiling and giggling at one another.

We all stare from the bus stop. Confused and amazed at this very cinematic Asian Drama we had just witnessed -- all done in a foreign dialect that no one understood. And yet, we all understood that this was the beginning of something good for this colorfully attired, orange-haired duo. Very beautiful indeed.

Whatever happened to all the partying, or hanging out til the early morn? I have a sudden urge to go out. It'd be good for my health. I want to see new faces, even if I'll never see them again. I want to meet a guy, not The Guy or The One (whatever the hell that means). I just wanna meet someone who would keep my mind off of the one that I can't stop thinking about, even if its only a short-lived distraction. Then maby this process can quicken and life can move on sooner.

I don't want to be in a runt.

It doesn't help that he's always 20 feet away and IMs me every night. Get over it. Get over it and go out. Stop spoiling myself with frivolous material items and long naps. This inaction is leading nowhere.

Don't believe in fairytales. Seriously, don't do it.

"many abuse victims identified with characters in famous children's literature and claimed the stories provide "templates" of dominated women."

Good thing my parents only owned the dictionary.

My Seven of Mankind jeans finally came in the mail today! When things get rough, buy... buy... BUY! I wonder how long this shop therapy will work.

This pair was quite a deal on eBay. The seller had to give up these almost perfect condition jeans due to weight gain. Aww. Plus she's short, so she already altered them to my height. Despite running a good 30 minutes at the gym this morning and a low calorie daily intake, I still got some pudge to get rid of if I wanna keep wearing these.

Must stop eating so much American food, otherwise I'd end up with an American body: Obese, high cholesterol, and colon cancer. Woo... what a future to look forward to! Sameeran and Francois - it IS possible to buy Mankind jeans. In yo' face!

I don't believe in fairytales.

How the young spruce tree conveniently sprouted 4 feet since the week of our break up, to perfectly veil our bedroom windows from each others' views, still boggles my mind. What was once in clear view is now in complete darkness. Yes, it was simply meant to be.

Davis police are roaming idiots. Go do something productive that benefits the people -- like having checkpoints at areas with large parties and alcohol consumption. Instead they follow sober, bored kids into their homes, where they find us standing around and staring at the floors in an unfurnished apartment. Giving us a $150 noise violation for NOT making noise but simply being a "substantially numbered" group that they saw; does that make any sense? We spent at least 30 minutes disputing these impossible claims. Guess we'll see them in court.

This is freakin Picnic Day weekend -- the most intoxicated weekend of the school year. Shouldn't they be stopping drunk drivers or underage drinking or something that prevents harm or increases safety to the community? I guess that's just too much real work to be doing on a Thursday night.

My new best friend came in the mail this morning. She's even engraved "| c. ngo |" on the backside. Oh man 1000+ songs and such easy usage. Damn I think I'm in love. <3

Needed to see another template, so I went to the generic bin on Blogger and picked up this number! Oy, can't wait til this summer when I have the time to make a decent (somewhat more creative) layout.

Over.

The end marks the beginning of something new. New actions, perspectives, habits, beliefs.

I never tried out for anything in my life.

Ran for the secretary position of the pre-optometry club this evening. It was a spur of the moment decision, and if I don't get elected, I think I'll try again for another position. Who cares if I lose. I can only win if I try. Sometimes I just need to try.

I never splurged more than a Benjamin on myself.

Bought a mini ipod from the Apple website this afternoon(student discount, of course). Now music will be in my life wherever I go. And I can compile the soundtrack of my life. Sometimes I need to quit being so cheap.

I never sought help from a professional.

Went to more tutoring this morning. The workshop professor knows who I am. Going to the professor's office hour 9am tomorrow morning. It would mark the first office hour I'd ever attend. Sometimes I need to put my pride away and get the help that I need.

I never cried about anyone to anyone before.

Mutually broke up with Nelson tonite. Almost a quick, clean break away -- my chin high, voice so confident. Before I could leave, he prodded me for more, wanting to know more of "why?" And before I knew it, it all came out. The answers, reasons, feelings that I try so hard to bury came out in vulnerability, honesty, and tears. Sometimes I just need to break open so people can understand.

Too much thinking... and too much is mucho bad. Avoided all this thinking by talking to Alvin in his room 'til 5:30 am this morning. Luckily he's hyperactive and jet lag from his Taiwan trip. Talking and seeing a face helps everything even if its about nothing. Chatting lets thoughts out, but human contact gives a certain reassurance that this damn AIM invention can't replace.

Its been nonstop talking and listening for the past 4 days, since I last high-drunk called Nelson on Thursday night, while he was on his way to a careless weekend in SD. Letting out some subtle (and not so subtle) angry, annoyed, frustrated, disappointed sarcastic remarks on the cell, half of which I don't remember and half of which I really meant. Since that night, no contact.

No fighting, no confrontations. Always a bunch of sarcastic jabs -- half cruel, half humor, all truth. Two pansies hiding in their own laughter.